A Clockwǿrk Lemon

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Deserved

Finally, a good break for me from work. =D

10:50 PM MUSED ~

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Life Is Meaningless

Life is meaningless. That's a mantra that many believe in, because it seems that we all exist simply to consume, reproduce and then, as any other living organism, fade into oblivion. I've decided to go against the grain because I'm sure that while this nihilistic viewpoint has it's merits, life exists simply to be an infinitely-layered piece of art, where each action, each feature, each difference, each similarity, does nothing less than to increase it's beauty.

11:14 PM MUSED ~

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Muse

So simple, yet so inspiring.

11:28 PM MUSED ~

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Any Means Necessary

Honestly, I find myself envious of people about a generation ago, who were unconnected by the Web. It's like, nowadays, compared to what some of those who had been through, our idea of fun is merely virtual - unreal. And it's strange how confined we are to what we're used to, instead of going out without any real sense of purpose but intent to simply have a good time, maybe an adventure.

I realised I haven't been taking care of myself well enough.

7:05 AM MUSED ~

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Bye Bye Beautiful Hearts on Fire

Nightwish - Bye Bye Beautiful

Hammerfall - Hearts on Fire

10:03 AM MUSED ~

Friday, January 1, 2010

Reflections of 2009

Looking back on the year 2009, as I'm sure many have been doing since the turn of the new year, I've realised that, as a person, I've grown a lot, maybe not from strength to strength, but definitely emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

After many defining moments in the short 2008-2009, I've learnt plenty about this all-encompassing phenomenon that is life. Based on that, I've defined goals for my own personal growth, aims for my own future. Ah yes, the future, that's all there is, isn't it?

Six letters that comprise everything we hope for, everything we hope to be, surpassing whatever there is in the past and present, yet made up of them. A strange thing indeed.

It's going to be another year ahead, with more, to use a phrase that I'd picked up in my JC days, watershed events to look forward to - my entering into adulthood in February, entering university in August (as Joey dearest so kindly brought up).

I don't know what the future holds (partially because whatever crystal ball I have doesn't really seem to function too well) but I know that if I keep to my principles, I'll be able to make something out of myself. It may not end up to be much, but for me, I guess, if it's the best I can do, then it's sufficient.

I've watched as friends of mine started moving on since their lives took a little hiatus, some starting tuition centres, some dabbling in other businesses, and I'm glad that they are. After all the nerve-wracking, harrowing experiences that they'd been subject to, I'm sure this is what they've sought in spite of all that and achieved.

As for the past, I've thought about many things, my stints as a volleyball player and my time serving the nation, in particular.

I guess it's funny how things have moved on so quickly since I last touched a volleyball competitively. Of the team that I'm proudest of, my secondary school, I think only one is still in the game. The rest of us have gone back to doing what (I guess) we'd much rather have been doing, but the memories, the trophies and the lessons learnt will always remain invaluable to us. Viewing the video of one of our triumphs on Facebook serves only to remind me of that.

In my one year and ten months (slightly longer) in the army, I'll have to say that while there were the good moments and the bad, it's just a part of life of every Singaporean male and there are no regrets doing what I did. Sure, there was the very important decision of falling out from BSLC rather than completing it, but then again, if I hadn't, who knows what would've happened, right?

As a mere Corporal, I would say, unashamed, that I matched up to whatever demands were required of me, and that working for the people I did was a real eye-opener. I learnt plenty from the first real boss of my army life and as for the second one, I shall refrain from commenting upon due to the short time that I knew him for.

I remember the grassy plains, the hilltop views, the amazing rides I took, as well as the camaraderie of my colleagues who are my friends, as we engaged in jobs we had no choice but to do, but did the best we could, just because we were who we were.

Of course, my relationship with Joey isn't forgotten. Without all that had happened before, I wouldn't have found this gem that is the love of my life, who, in herself, contains all the beautiful memories of life past and present, as well as hope, for the future. I'm not the kind of write such stuff on my rather less-personal blog, but I'm glad that that I've got you, Joey, and I couldn't have asked for anyone else.

Spiritually, I've realised the pitfalls of commercialised religion. It's almost as if people are selling the future, full of ~~beer~~ milk, honey, love and joy, which they cannot guarantee aside from a couple of ancient manuscripts that seem to "make sense" while other beliefs are demonised.

If talking gibberish is a divine gift, well then, what about the superhuman abilities to raise their body temperatures during mediation, running over hot coals and such as? Isn't it just about the extremities that the human body is able to go? Then, logic is thrown out the window, and whatever critical-thinking one may have are simply discouraged because, well, you don't need any of that when faith is all that is needed.

Yes, it may seem wrong, but c'mon, because so many of us tell you that it is right, it is. No, don't ask questions, just believe, do what we ask you to, fork out a little bit from your monthly pay cheque to support us and you'll get this fantasy world when you're dead. Wait, I meant, after you wake up from your long slumber, sorry for the lack of tact.

I don't know, but personally, I find that some are more nefarious than the Heaven's Gate mass suicide incident and more full of holes covered up by mere charisma than any scheme Charles Ponzi could've cooked up.

But then again, that is my personal belief, which I do not advocate, just that I decided to pen it down. In the meantime, I'm finding my own way.

Then, as for the present, well, work has been kind to me in recent times, though certain issues tend to tempt me to find greener pastures. Meh meh. I just hope that whatever I gain from this sacrifice of time will be worthwhile, be it material or immaterial.

It's almost as if the situation is malleable and subject to change (I hate this term) at any time because, well, there's a requirement to be flexible. For us, anyway. As for the system in place to keep us and the bottom line in check, it's rigid as, well, something rigid. It's not completely bad, as I've found, adaptability is a human trait that's constantly overlooked. One day we're dying from the workload, but as time goes by, a bar set high becomes the norm. As for those things that irk me, well, I guess I could live with some of them.

So much to look forward to in 2010. Maybe the world will end in 2012, but then, it's still another two years to live the fullest. And I plan to. Will you? Here's to having an awesome 2010 and many, many great years to come. Cheers!

10:42 PM MUSED ~

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Goal 2010 - Scrapped

Weren't we supposed to qualify for the World Cup Finals 2010?

7:36 AM MUSED ~